MotoGP Deutschland

Guten Tag from the Sausagering, where the MotoGP boys will unleash a fleet of 800cc Panzers in hopes of victory in the Motherland. Last time out, at Catalunya, Jorge Lorenzo pretty much blew everyone's doors off enroute to his fifth win of the season and an even more biggerer championship points lead. Will Lorenzo's Blitzkreig continue, or will another rider step up and send Lorenzo to hide in his secret bunker?

In other news...Germany marks Valentino Rossi's return to action after using his broken leg as an excuse to take a 4-race holiday. Coming into Germany, Rossi sat about 100 points behind Lorenzo in the points. With 7 of the 18 rounds in the books, could Rossi overhaul Lorenzo for the title before heading off to Ducati in 2011? It wouldn't surprise me.

Qualifying came and went, and Lorenzo helped himself to his 4th pole position of the year...but not before conveniently exploding his motor along the front straight and coating the hard-braking zone into turn 1 with a glistening layer of Yamalube. Lorenzo's Oil Can Harry tactic had the closely-following Ben Spies on his ass and into the gravel followed by DePuniet.

As far as the rest of the starting grid...K.C. Stoner and Dani Pedrosa rounded out the front row. Rossi managed a decent 5th on the grid. Colin Edwards 12th, Spies 13th, and Nicky Hayden back in 15th...not exactly a star-spangled qualifying session.

Grid 'em up and roll 'em out...Pedro gets his usual holeshot into turn 1 followed by Lorenzo and some dude named Barbara on a private Duck. Dovi and Stoner dispatch Barbara to take over 3rd and 4th, while Lorenzo takes Pedro for the lead...all in the same 2 corners. Bitchin'. Hayden made a good start up to 8th from 15th on the grid.

Things pretty much held station until 24(of 30)laps to go, when Colin Edwards chucked his Yamaha into the gravel...he was expendable. Then, with 21 to go, a huge turd dropped in the punchbowl...DePuniet highsided his Honda into one of the tight left-handers, Espargaro motocrossed over DePuniet's leg, and Bautista pretty much motocrossed over everything/body. The race was red-flagged as DePuniet's flaming bike was extinguished while he was carted off to the hospital with a destroyed leg.

MotoGp Deutschland Part Deux...a new 21 lap race. The sausage dropped and, once again, Pedro hits the front. Kallio hit the deck as Hayden barged his way up to 5th. Pedro and Lorenzo went back and forth at the front with Pedro finally hitting the front and gapping Lorenzo for the win. Lorenzo played it cool and hauled home 20 valuable championship points in 2nd.

While this was going on, Rossi blew past Dovi on the brakes to take 4th. At the front, it was still Pedro, Lorenzo, and Stoner...with Rossi closing. By now, Rossi was on Stoner's ass and looking to crutch himself on to the podium. Rossi went past Stoner, on the brakes, to briefly take 3rd. On the following lap, Stoner put a rather stout block-pass move on Rossi to take back 3rd. Rossi got back into 3rd only to have Stoner stuff him on the last corner of the last lap to secure 3rd. Oi!

Result:
1 Dani Pedrosa/Repsol Honda
2 Jorge Lorenzo/Fiat Yamaha
3 Casey Stoner/Marlboro Ducati
4 Valentino Rossi/Fiat Yamaha
5 Andrea Dovizioso/Repsol Honda
6 Marco Simoncelli/San Carlo Gresini Honda
7 Nicky Hayden/Marlboro Ducati
8 Ben Spies/Tech 3 Yamaha
9 Hector Barbera/Aspar Ducati
10 Marco Melandri/San Carlo Gresini Honda
11 Loris Capirossi/Rizla Suzuki
12 Alex De Angelis/Interwetten Honda

Das Gravel Boot:
Aleix Espargaro/Pramac Ducati
Randy DePuniet/LCR Honda
Alvaro Bautista/Rizla Suzuki
Colin Edwards/Tech 3 Yamaha
Mika Kallio/Pramac Ducati

Top 10 Championship Points after Germany
1 Lorenzo/185
2 Pedrosa/138
3 Dovizioso/102
4 Stoner/83
5 Hayden/78
6 Rossi/74
7 DePuniet/69
8 Spies/67
9 Simoncelli/49
10 Melandri/45

Alright folks...crack open a Bud heavy, deep-fry a Twinkie, and shave your favorite 'driver's' number in your back hair as MotoGP heads stateside, this weekend, at Laguna Seca. Rossi's won here, but Lorenzo has not. Also...welcome Roger Lee Hayden back to the clubhouse as he fills in for the injured Randy DePuniet on the LCR Honda. 'The Rog' last rode a MotoGP bike in 2007 as a wildcard at Laguna Seca and finished a decent 10th (on a Kawasaki, no less) ahead of both Colin Edwards and big bro Nicky. Porkchop!

MotoGP Catalunya

Last time out, at Assen, Whore-hey Lorenzo took advantage of another Rossi-free race to completely gut the rest of the field, rack up his fifth win of the season, and extend his championship points lead to 47 points. Even though he backed his pace way down on the last lap, he still managed to cross the line roughly 6 seconds in front of 2nd place Pedrosa. Game over...flawless victory.

So then...here we are at Lorenzo's home race at Catalunya. With Rossi back home hibernating in a Hyperbaric chamber and Lorenzo on the tail-end of a 3-win streak, it's pretty fucking obvious what's going to happen at Catalunya...and it did. Lorenzo helped himself to pole position as well as being quickest in all practice sessions. Not satisfied with that, Lorenzo went on to win a Chorizo eating contest in the Fiat Yamaha hospitality area and planted a little Lorenzoland toothpick/flag in the leftovers.

Sunday, July 4th at 2 p.m CST (Central Spanish Time)...the little red lights go away and Little Dani gets the wholeshot, but forgot to brake and ran wide which let pretty much everyone and their mama past. This put 'guess who' in the lead followed by Stoner and Dovizioso. On the Yankee tip, Spies dropped back to 5th from an 8th place start and Hayden sat back in 10th just behind Pedro.

By the end of the 1st lap, DePuniet has done a reverse full retreat and tagged on to the back of the front three...a.k.a. 4th place. Two corners later, Dovi leg-dangled his way past Stoner to take 2nd. At the begininng of the next lap, Dovi went one better and took Lorenzo for the lead into turn 1.

While this was going on, Pedro got his shit together, and was making his way towards the front o' the pack. Meanwhile, back up front, King Lorenzo was getting tired rolling around in a lowly 2nd place, and put a ridiculous pass on Dovi through the left/right Wurth chicane to take over his God-gifted spot at the top of charts. With the front three tripping over each in the battle for the lead, Pedro made his way up to 4th and looked to be closing in on the fisticuffs up front. Things settled down up fron (i.e.; got boring) until Stoner out-broke his damn self, from 3rd, and ran way off track...this put Stoner back in 5th behind Pedro and Depuniet. Stoner quickly kicked DePuniet to the curb and closed up on Pedro for 3rd.

9 laps to go, and Dovi beaches his Honda R-series211V at turn 8. This gifts Lorenzo the win, but Pedro and Stoner are still back yonder scrapping over 2nd and 3rd. ans Stoner and Pedro beat the shit out of each other for 2nd place. Pedro, somehow, came out on top of this scrap to bring it home in 2nd followed by Stoner in...um...3rd

.

Once again, Lorenzo waltzed home for the win and extended his championship lead to 52 points over Pedrosa. Dovi remounted and finished somewhere between 13th and 15th. Word on the street is that Stoner is re-jumping ship back to Honda for 2011. The other word on the street is that Rossi will take Stoner's spot to partner Hayden (and make 15 million Euros...whatever that is) on next year's on the factory Ducati team. Bellisimo! With Rossi out in 2011 at Yamaha, that would make way for Spies to move up from the Yamaha Tech 3 team to partner Lorenzo on the 2nd Fiat Yamaha factory machine. Makes sense to me.

Result

1) Jorge Lorenzo/Fiat Yamaha
2) Dani Pedrosa/Repsol Honda
3) Casey Stoner/Marlboro Ducati
4) Randy DePuniet/LCR Honda
5) Alvaro Bautista/Rizla Suzuki
6) Ben Spies/Tech 3 Yamaha
7) Loris Capirossi/Rizla Suzuki
8) Nicky Hayden/Marlboro Ducati
9) Marco Melandri/San Carlo Gresini Honda
10) Hector Barbera/Paginas Amarillas Aspar Ducati
11) Colin Edwards/Tech 3 Yamaha
12) Mika Kallio/Pramac Racing Ducati
13) Kousuke Akiyoshi/Interwetten Honda
14) Andrea Dovizioso/Repsol Honda
15) Wataru Yoshikawa/Fiat Yamaha

Grupo de Crasho

Marco Simoncelli/San Carlo Gresini Honda
Aleix Espargaro/Pramac Racing Ducati

Championship points after round 7 of 18.

1)Lorenzo-165
2)Pedrosa-113
3)Dovizioso-91
4)Hayden-69
5)DePuniet-69
6)Stoner-67
7)Rossi-61
8)Spies-59
9)Melandri-39
10)Simoncelli-39

So that's that...the next time out, the boys will goose-step into the Motherland for the German MotoGP at der Sachsenring. Rossi is planning his post-leg snap return in Germany after a successful 24 lap shakedown of his gimp leg on a World Superbike spec R1 at Misano, earlier this week. Hopefully he doesn't do the Doohan.

T...out.

*Pics from superbikeplanet.com and motogp.com

MotoGP Silverstone

So, here it is, the British MotoGP round at the new and improved Silverstone. Up to this year, the British MotoGP has been held at Iron Maiden's old stomping grounds, Donington Park. The last time Silverstone hosted MotoGP was in the mid-80's, or a time most of the MotoGP riders refer to as the 'womb years'

.

Champion leader, Lorenzo, helped himself to pole position. DePuniet (who did a trackday with the Silverstone locals a week or so before the race...cheater) sat in 2nd, followed by Pedrosa in 3rd. The second row consisted of one-part Dovizioso, one-part Hayden, and one-part Stoner. Spies sat 7th and Edwards sat somewhere between Spies and last on the grid...again.

Moving right along...Lights out, and everyone (except Stoner) piled in to turn 1. Except Stoner, you ask? It seems Stoner left his carbon fiber-handled parking brake on and slow-balled into the first corner in last place from a 6th place start...Oops. Meanwhile, Lorenzo hits the front followed by Pedro. Pedro made a few half-assed attempts at getting into the lead before Lorenzo kicked him to the curb, gapped the field, and scurried off to win another race by a country Kilometer. JLo's victory celebration was some sort of Spanish-to-English- then-back-to-Spanish Google-Translated version of Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band. It worked, I guess.

Meanwhile, back in the pack...things were getting kind of hectic in the fight for the first and second loser spots on the box. Track day cheater, De Puniet, was looking quick in 3rd and soon put his Bunny Bike past Pedro and up into the provisional first loser spot. Dovizioso now sat quietly in 3rd and quickly closed down the track day cheater. While this was-a-happenin', Pedro was dropping off the pace and soon fucked up and got taken by Hayden for 4th. Pedro continued to drop off and soon had Marco Simoncelli 'piling pressure on his rear'. A few laps later, Pedro finally got a little sore and let Simoncelli through into 5th. Ben Pies then started to apply his own Texas-style pressure on Pedro and went up the inside of him in one of the tight sections (of the track). Later in that lap, Spies tee'd up Simoncelli and went past him on the brakes into turn 1. Dovi finally closed down De Puniet and went past him on the front straight to take 2nd.

10 to go, and Hayden managed to close down the front group and looked to be in the hunt for his first podium of 2010. De Puniet roasted the tires on the Bunny Bike, and both Hayden and Spies went past him to take over 3rd and 4th, respectively. 6 to go, and Capirossi followed Melandri's first lap example, and put on his own scratch-and-dent sale in turn 1...'For sale: lightly scuffed aquamarine-colored front fender. Fits 2008-2010 Suzuki GSVR's. Serious buyers only.'

The American Inquisition...3 to go, and Hayden was sitting in 3rd with Spies closing him down. Hayden split his time between chasing Dovi for 2nd and holding off Spies...it was good to see Hayden back to his 'sideways' shenanigans. Last lap, and Dovi sat in a fairly safe 2nd which left Hayden and Spies in a cage match for the final podium spot. At the end of the back straight, Spies looked to be going past Hayden on the inside/brakes, but Hayden squashed that move, and re-outbraked Spies around the outside to maintain 3rd. Spies then lined up Hayden for another move, but Hayden saved Spies the effort by running wide and letting him through, easy-boat style. Spies the rode the shit out of the last half o' lap in super-defensive mode, and just held off Hayden for his debut MotoGP podium. Golf claps, all around for the Texan.

Result:

1) Lorenzo/Fiat Yamaha

2) Dovizioso/Repsol Honda

3) Spies/Monster Tech 3 Yamaha

4) Hayden/Marlboro Ducati

5) Stoner/Marlboro Ducati

6) De Puniet/Playboy LCR Honda

7) Simoncelli/San Carlo Gresini Honda

8) Pedrosa/Repsol Honda

9) Edwards/Monster Tech 3 Yamaha

10)Espagaro/Pramac Ducati

11)Barbera/Paginas Amarillas Aspar Ducati

12)Bautista/Rizla Suzuki

13)Kallio/Pramac Ducati

No Result:

Capirossi/Rizla Suzuki

Melandri/San Carlo Gresini Honda

Top 10 Points After Round 5

1) Lorenzo/115

2) Dovizioso/78

3) Pedrosa/73

4) Rossi/61

5) Hayden/52

6) De Puniet/46

7) Spies/36

8) Stoner/35

9) Melandri/32

10)Simoncelli/32

So, with Rossi out for a few more months, the title is pretty much Lorenzo's to lose. The big to-do will be who will take 2nd and 3rd at the end of the season.

The next round is this weekend at Assen, a track at which Hayden has won and podiumed over the years. Spies is also familiar with Assen from his time in World Superbike, last year...meaning he won't have to spend the first practice session fucking around trying to figure out which way the track goes and whatnot. Methinks Hayden and/or Spies will be on the box this time around...care to wager? Don't forget, the race is on SATURDAY on SpeedTV @ 8:30am CST. I guess I'll have to DVR my cartoons.

T...out

*Photos from superbikeplanet.com, motogp.com, and mcnews.com.au

MotoGP @ Mugello

Last time out, at Le Mans, Jorge Lorenzo smoked Valentino Rossi and took the race win by over 5 seconds. In the process, Lorenzo also shot to the top of the charts in the championship points standings.

This brings us to round 4 at Moo-Jello. With this being Rossi's home race, the Yellow shirts were out en masse to witness their golden boy avenge his Frenchtastic ass-kicking. So...how would the race unfold? What epic scenario would play out as Rossi snatches back a race win and the championship points lead? Take my handy-dandy prerace quiz. No notes and no cheating, please.

Q. At Mugello, Rossi will...?

A) Get the holeshot, clear off, and win by 12 seconds.

B) Endure a race-long battle with Lorenzo and punt him into the gravel on the final corner to take the win.

C) Take himself and Lorenzo in the first turn.

D) Highside in practice, break his leg, and miss the race altogether.

E) Cook his tires in the opening laps trying to keep up with Pedrosa and drift back to an eventual 6th place finish.

F) Skip the race to go test a Ferrari F1 car.

G) Get a ride-through penalty for a jumpstart, rejoin the race, and bag a respectable 4th.

And the answer is...

'D'...During practice, Rossi tossed himself over the bars and into space. When he returned to Earth, he broke his lower right leg (shin bone) on impact. The break was so severe that the bone tore through the skin, and Rossi was choppered to a local hospital for surgery. Mugello would be the first race Rossi has missed in his entire GP career, and it looks like he'll be out for the rest of the year. Hundreds of Rossi fans were found dead under the bleachers hanging by Yellow '46' t-shirts fashioned into nooses. Get well soon (Rossi, not the fans).

Enough about that. Repsol Honda's Dani Ponderosa starts from from pole, followed by Lorenzo and Stoner. Nicky Hayden heads up the second row in 4th followed by Colin Edwards in an oh-so-familiar 5th. Spies in 7th...not too shabby for his first time at this track.

On to the racing...The lights go out and Pedrosa leads into the first corner followed closely by Lorenzo. Spies got a good start up to 4th from 7th. Stoner and Hayden sat back in 5th and 6th. At the end of the first lap it's Pedro, Lorenzo, and Dovizioso. Lap 2 and Pedro sets the fastest lap, gaps the field, and scampers off for the win. Enough about him.

With Pedro making a B-line to the kiddie pool, the battle for the last two podium spots is on like Donkey Kong, with Lorenzo and Dovi beating the shit out of each other at every braking zone. While this was going on, Homeboy Hayden got bored with the race and decided to set sail on the U.S.S. Gravelboat....man overboard. What about former MotoGP champ Stoner? He's pooping around in 5th place...pretty much phoning it in until he jumps ship to Repsol Honda in 2011. Two naval references in one paragraph, thank you very much.

Lorenzo finally shakes off Dovi and sets sail (it never ends) for Pedro at the front. With Pedro's gap a bridge too far, Lorenzo will have to settle for second, and Dovi a comfortable third.

With the laps winding down, an epic battle for fourth continues between DePuniet, Melandri, Stoner, and Spies. All four are looking rather quick, but Stoner now remembers that he hasn't signed an actual contract with Honda for 2011 and decides it would be a good idea to win this battle just in case...don't quit your job before you've found a new one. Stoner made his way through this group and bagged a decent fourth. Spies hung on the back to grab seventh at his first time at Mugello.

Up front, Pedro cruises home for the win followed by Lorenzo and Dovizio. Even with Pedro's win, Lorenzo increased his lead in the championship points standings. The points look like this after 4 rounds...1)Lorenzo 2)Pedrosa 3)Rossi 4)Dovizioso 5)Hayden 6) DePuniet 7) Melandri 8) Simoncelli 9) Stoner 10) Spies.

Smooth Sailing:

1 Pedrosa/Repsol Honda

2 Lorenzo/Fiat Yamaha

3 Dovzioso/Repsol Honda

4 Stoner/Ducati Marlboro

5 Melandri/San Carlo Honda Gresini

6 De Puniet/LCR Honda

7 Spies Tech/3 Yamaha

8 Espargaro/Pramac Racing Ducati

9 Simoncelli/San Carlo Honda Gresini

10 Capirossi/Rizla Suzuki

11 Aoyama/Interwetten Honda MotoGP

12 Barbera/Paginas Amarillas Aspar Ducati

13 Edwards/II Tech 3 Yamaha

14 Bautista/Rizla Suzuki

Man Overboard:

Hayden/Ducati Marlboro

Kallio/Pramac Racing Ducati

Next time out it's Silverstone...who will be on Rossi's bike?

'A cowboy is to the prairie as a sailor is to the sea'

T...out

Road America Oh-Ten

Right turn, Clyde.

Neato.

Sausage party.

600's into turn 8...my camera sucks.

They grow cheese in these things.

Each campsite came with a complimentary rainstorm.

Jake Holden + Danny Eslick + 2 Harley XR1200's + Turn 3 = This picture.

Ducs in a row.

Gearing up for getting down...Superbike starting grid.

Horn mono.

PJ...campsite stunna.

This is how exciting the electric bike race was.

Wolverine Westby

Into Turn 1

PJ again.

www.onthethrottle.com

OnTheThrottle.com is going to be using some songs by my (now defunct) band, The Chezwicks, in their roadracing video updates...Here's the first installment. There are two bands used in this vid...we're the one using real guitars and drums. Duh.

Bayliss Pt. Deux

I'm sorry to harp on about this, but Bayliss just completed the first day of his 'test' of a factory Ducati Xerox/xoreX 1198 (R-series) superbike @ Mugello. After being off a bike for over 18 months, Bayliss put in best lap of 1:59.9, which is over 1/2 second (or 6/10th of a second if you want to get all mathematical-n-shit) than current factory Ducati riders Haga and Fabrizio managed earlier this year at a test at the same track

You'll also notice in the pictures (both of which taken at the same test) that Bayliss is sporting 2 different brands of helmets...sorting out a new helmet sponsor?

From WorldSBK.com...Regarding an eventual return to the track for Bayliss, team manager Ernesto Marinelli refused to make any significant comments, declaring: "Hold on, this is an important decision that we will eventually leave up to Troy. It's clear that for him the door is always open".

The next time Bayliss will ride the Ducati will be at Misano during World Ducati Week from 10 to 13 June.

T...out.

Bayliss Back In 2011?

Article by Dean Adams over at the ever-rad superbikeplanet.com

Three-time World Superbike champion and full-fledged Ducati racing hero Troy Bayliss is contemplating a return to World Superbike racing.

Bayliss retired at the culmination of the 2008 World Superbike season with 52 wins and three world titles. His forthright, workingman persona, coupled with his prowess on a Ducati Superbike, made him a favorite of fans from the alleys near the Ducati factory in Bologna to the pit lane at Salt Lake City's Miller Motorsports Park, and all points in between. Now, after a season off from racing, Bayliss says he is mulling a racing comeback.

Reached last night in his hotel room in Italy, the Australian spoke with Superbikeplanet.com about his retirement and unhappiness in leaving racing, which many infer happened a season or two too early.

Asked if, after a full season of not racing, he has come to terms with being retired, Bayliss said in his characteristically blunt fashion, "Not one little bit, not at all."

"All I can say is that I am going back to ride the bike again," Bayliss confessed, "and I am thinking about starting again, honestly."

Bayliss tested the factory Ducati MotoGP bike last season and is, in fact, testing a factory Ducati Superbike today at Mugello. It's clear that his role as a sometimes test rider for the factory has not been enough to placate's Bayliss' competitive spirit and need to win. Perhaps his future is in team management at Ducati Superbike? Bayliss: "You're joking right? I have no interest in being a team manager of any kind. The test riding job is okay but ...".

The triple world champion sealed his WSBK career with a third title in his final season of racing, and left little doubt of his ability right up until the final lap. He won both WSBK legs at Portimao, his then final race. At the time, many of his rivals openly scoffed that he would stay retired for long, with both Ruben Xaus and Max Biaggi saying privately that they expected to see Bayliss back on a Superbike eventually. Xaus predicted that he'd be on the bike and racing in 2009.

"I quit too early," Bayliss said last night. "I'm pissed off because I stopped one championship short of Fogarty and I'm seven wins down on him."

Was this just idle talk from Bayliss? "I'm not joking," he said. "This is basically all I want to say for now. If I do come back, I should be on a Ducati." Bayliss clearly made an effort to clearly form the word "should" when speaking this sentence.

Is the current state of the factory Ducati WSBK team—they struggled at Monza and were not competing for the podium—a factor as to why Bayliss is strongly considering donning his leathers and taking the grid again? It's difficult to know. Bayliss spoke about his old team, saying that they had "hit a rough patch" but that he wasn't surprised that they were under the gun at ultra-high-speed Monza.

"We struggled there in top speed in 2008, so it's no surprise that they did this year," he said. "The bike is lacking a little bit of top end power. I think Monza was one of the most difficult races they'll have this year. The Ducati can still win; we saw it in Valencia where Nori had to come from a long way back."

About the rider who replaced him on the factory Ducati team, Bayliss said, "Nori has always been a rider that's had to build himself up over a weekend and the way qualifying is now (the new SuperPole format) doesn't suit him. I think if he could sort out his qualifying issues he could be winning races."

Throughout his career at Ducati, Bayliss enjoyed a close relationship with Ducati race engineer Ernesto Marinelli. The two worked together when Bayliss set the pole for the Daytona 200 on the Vance & Hines Ducati Superbike and continued that successful collaboration when Bayliss replaced the legendary Carl Fogarty on the factory WSBK team. When Ducati team manager Davide Tardozzi left Ducati, Marinelli moved up from the engineering ranks to guide the team. Bayliss didn't vocalize this, but it can't be easy to stand by and watch Marinelli and company struggle.

"I said, let's do a test with Ernesto and the boys and see what we can do, do a race sim (simulation) and let's see," Bayliss said.

Bayliss' often-told story is one of an auto body shop worker, probably too old to race at the world level who proved conventional wisdom and many, many experts wrong by becoming the pre-eminent Superbike rider in the world and a multi-time world champion. What fueled Bayliss' drive through that incredible journey is a quiet confidence and a passion to compete and win.

"I can tell you that I'm looking forward to tomorrow more than any tomorrow since I retired," Bayliss said last night on the eve of his Ducati Superbike test.

MotoGP Jerez - Go Jump In A Lake

As you may or may not know, last weekend's Japenese MotoGP was postponed due the Icelandic volcano known as 'Eyjafjallajokull' (say that three times fast), blowing its ashy load all over Europe and fucking up air travel in the process. This gave the riders an extra week to injure themselves in motorcross and mountain bike accidents. It also gave me an extra week to get a new laptop...someone destroyed my old one.

Qualifying came and went, and is was Lil' Danny (hold the soft egg and pickled onions, please) Pedrosa on pole, with KC Stoner and Lorenzo rounding out the front row. Rossi, Hayden, and some French guy made up the 2nd row. The other Americans, Edwards and Spies, started from 7th and 8th. Go team!

Race day...the riders took the grid spots, a giant flying saucer landed above the starting grid, the 120,000+ fans simultaneously shit their pants, and the riders got their motors running and headed out on the...um...race track. As usual, Pedrosa took the lead into the first corner, followed by Rossi, Hayden, Lorenzo, Stoner, and Spies. Everyone held station for the first few laps, and then Pedro and Rossi put a gap on Hayden and the rest. To his credit, Hayden was still looking strong in 3rd, and had a decent gap over teammate Stoner and JLo. Meanwhile, Capirossi chucked his Suzuki down the road, and Spies was fading fast, until he finally pulled the plug on his race due to a seized tire manifold. Bummer, dude.

At the front, Pedrosa was starting to open a gap over Rossi. While all seemed fine and dandy for Pedrosa, it was his compatriot and Facebook friend, Lorenzo, who was about to take Hayden for 3rd and eventually make his way to the front. Lorenzo quickly went past Hayden and closed down Rossi. 6 laps to go, and Lorenzo smashes through Rossi's dangling Yellow leg and takes the lead into turn 1. 2 laps to go, and Lorenzo is right on Pedro's arse. Lorenzo made his first move on the inside a the end of the back straight, but just smashed into Pedro's rear tire and had to back off. JLo's next attempt came two corners later as he tried to go around the outside. This didn't work, either, but he was successful in again bashing into Pedro and probably tearing off a knee slider and a few sponsors' stickers.

Last lap...JLo lines up Pedro at the end of the back straight, and completely stuffs him into the corner so hard that Pedro almost runs it off into gravel-land. Pedro manages to get his shit together in time before Rossi gets past.

Lorenzo cruises home to an epic win at his home GP in front of 120,000+ apeshit fans. Once Lorenzo crossed under the flying saucer for the final time, he did what everyone who wins their home GP does...parked his bike and jumped into the trackside lake. Excellent.

El resultado de la carrera:

1 Jorge Lorenzo/Fiat Yamaha

2 Dani Pedrosa/Repsol Honda

3 Valentino Rossi/Fiat Yamaha

4 Nicky Hayden/Marlboro Ducati

5 Casey Stoner/Marlboro Ducati

6 Andrea Dovizioso/Repsol Honda

7 Mika Kallio/Pramac Racing Ducati

8 Marco Melandri/San Carlo Gresini Honda

9 Randy De Puniet/LCR Honda

10 Alvaro Bautista/Rizla Suzuki

11 Marco Simoncelli/San Carlo Gresini Honda

12 Colin Edwards/Tech 3 Yamaha

13 Hector Barbera/Paginas Amarillas Aspar Ducati

14 Hiroshi Aoyama/Interwetten Honda

15 Aleix Espargaro/Pramac Racing Ducati

No está completa

Ben Spies/Tech 3 Yamaha/Broken Tire

Loris Capirossi/Rizla Suzuki/Fell Over

There you have it...Lorenzo takes a 4 point championship lead over Rossi with Pedrosa sitting/standing in 3rd. Hayden and Dovizioso are tied for 4th at 26 points each. Stoner, Spies, and Melandri are all tied for 8th with 11 points each.

Next stop...The French Grand Prix at Le Moans on May 23rd. T...out.